Reproductive System Traveler T-Shirts

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"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

Mr. Punch in Venice

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

'With these alternative fertility treatments you never quite know how things turn out,'

'He bowed lower for me than for you.'

Off to see the world

Vaccination Passport

Remember, it's about the journey, not the destination. But sure, I'll keep an eye out for a rest area.

Lenin, Anticipating His Arrival at Finland Station, Sees His Baggage Taken Off at Beloostrov.

'St. Joseph's Church,today's sermon, the road to heaven (free maps)'

A white collar cow.

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

'It's a great job, but the commuting is murder!'

When travelling with her cat by plane, train, or bus, dawn always ensured no one would bother them.

"I know it's only our second date, and stop me if I'm moving too fast, but, would you non-rev with me?"

Rainbow/Horizon

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

'Anything to declare?'

'And upon landing the pilot will give everyone in first class a hug.'

Miniature Trailer on Desert Island

Gwendolyn found herself deep in the Lake district,

A guy fills up his camel with H2O in the desert.

'If you want produce grown on the farm down the road you'll have to go to Kuala Lumpur.'

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.

'Is it just my imagination, or do we have a lot more relatives now that we're throwing a tailgate party?'

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.