Relocating Office Gifts

'Office amenities' dangled by 'Leasing agents'

"Jackson couldn't afford to renew the lease on his office."

The fate of the emigrant

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

'Great news, Dear! I've been traded to a think tank in California for a PhD Specializing in the Baltics!'

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

'The only problem downtown offices have using solar power is finding a long enough extension cord.'

"The more coffee I drink, the more these motivational posters make sense."

'I don't care what the Hares have. Dial-Up is good enough for us!'

"And best of all, it comes fully loaded!"

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

Between Offices

"But if you leave New Orleans, you'll be just another sandwich."

You are here.

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

Of course I always start off by wooing a prospective candidate with talk of stimulating work,great colleagues and a reasonable work life balance...but the winning argument is always when I promise them enough money to choke a rhino.

'WOW! This ladies' nav app is fantastic!'

Jeff realised it was probably time to discontinue his subscription to 'Office Plant of the Month'.

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

'It's hard to believe this is just an atrium.'

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

While You Were Out: We Moved!

Offices moved to 23rd floor - taking the company to new heights - the management.

'It may not be our usual business lunch, but it will sure impress the hell out of the budget committee.'

"Hi Sean, welcome to my open space. Take a stand and let's talk."

Oh boy, lucky you were there: I was cramping up. I need a few minutes rest if you don't mind...

"Cubicle 311 is our 'cultural oasis'."

"This city is becoming unlivable."

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

The Move.

"The water does taste a little funny. Maybe they added analgesics, to ease the pain of restructuring."