Religious Humor Fan Prints

'The first commandment is: Thou shalt not shoot the messenger.'

'Thank you for choosing our automated service, for venial sin, press one...'

Businessmen presented with the Ten Commandments: 'We'll think about it.'

"The Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away. Nothing personal, it's just business."

'70% is pretty good, but not when it's the 10 commandments.'

Paul was Generally Considered the Cutest Apostle

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

"A vow of poverty and sponsorship aren't necessarily exclusive."

'You're not confessing, you're bragging!'

'Could you dumb it down a little?'

'For the hundredth time. Sup not from the chalice with a cold sore!'

"When we get to the promised land I never want to even see a piece of mann again for as long as I live."

'Peter Cottontail on the Bunny Trail...'

Om and Ommer

Sister Helena became the "ruler" of the Sisters of Christ the King Penguin

'That 'Jonah' story sounded FISHY to me!'

"Saturday night, Your Eminence. The nuns are ready for their bath."

'You've all been whining a lot lately, so this week's sermon is from the 'Book of Lamentations'....'

"It's a Sunday school."

The man who gave up utensils for Lent.

"Yikes! Somebody ask him if they take plastic."

'I'd like to buy you a pony, Harry, but I don't get to keep the offering.'

"I see here several good deeds that seem to have gone unpunished."

Mass for Shut-Ins

"I don't care what the Sunday School Teacher says, I don't think there is a commandment about extra goldfish crackers."

Pastor Andy's pet peeves finally get the better of him.

'New Charismatic'

Papal Pranks

Two doors at the church, one labelled cry room the other snore room.

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

'Looks like manor form heaven.'

Monk to monk: 'Can you take over? I have to tinkle.'

Preacher performs a miracle.

A man running on top of water

'Born again bees