Relativity Explorer Gifts

Einstein discovers that time can stop completely.

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

"This year we decided to vacation on the 3rd rock."

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

"It's the dawn of a new era"

Einstein develops his theories that time is relative while ordering at a fast food restaurant.

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

'We studied the Big Dipper and the Little Dipper today. May I have an ice cream cone?'

"...Ooh, I wanna know more about your dark side!"

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

The World's Biggest Book Club

"Whatever it is, we're up to our necks in it!"

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, in all the solar systems, in all the galaxies, in all the universe, she walks into mine.

"Siri, find oxygen."

"Stargazing sure is less painful at night."

"See? A huge surge in all the major crowdfunding sites right before the Big Bang!"

Mars Poppins

"Notice how Dad ages faster at relativistic speeds?"

Leaving a Real Impression: That's one small step for (a) man, one giant leap for mankind.

"Going to Mars sounded like fun. Do you think we can get dad to finance it?"

"If the stars should appear one night in a thousand years, how would men believe and adore, and preserve for many generations the remembrance of the city of God which had been shown! … Emerson" "Good boy!"

An alien dog hangs its head out the flying saucer.

Space shuttle helping to unlock the secrets of the universe.

Why Radio Astronomers often strike out.

"I'm dating a lunar astronaut!"

"Let's f**k up Mars!"

God passing the time.

"You know what I think, babe? Seven on the Richter scale."

Truth

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

Are you interested in UFOs? Advanced life forms? Free medical screenings? Alternative underwear? Snacks and refreshments? Non-sexual turtles? Reverse pound cake? Science? Join us.