Relationship Runner Gifts

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

In the Guru District

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

'My understanding of psychiatry is that women fantasiss and men internalise - in fact I'd like to internalise right now.'

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

'Charlie is the first to admit that he's too old for me.'

"Why don't you find a museum!"

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"I feel we haven't moved beyond parallel play."

"We'll always have couples therapy."

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

Couples' therapy

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

She - Interpreter - He.

'Great Therapy!'

I want to rip out our lawn and plant a wild meadow. And I want lost of well-mown grass. What do you recommend? Nursery open. Just a sec. I'll check with my dad. No way! Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm not suggesting a marriage counselor!

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

Tunnel of Love/Tunnel of Marriage

"You never told me your dad was so delightfully old-fashioned."

'When we first met there was a chemistry between us. These days though, it's more of a 'chemistry set'.'

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"The whole time we were dating, he kept saying, 'You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

"Of course I won't forget to tell you when quarantine's over!"

"There's something I have to tell you."

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

"Do we go out or do we stay home and open a can of worms?"

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."