Relationship Musers Mugs

"I have no luck with women. Am I racist for blaming someone who wasn't born here?"

In the Guru District

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"We'll always have couples therapy."

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

Couples' therapy

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

'Great Therapy!'

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"Of course I won't forget to tell you when quarantine's over!"

'This rift between you and Dr. Voight has become a chasm.'

"There's something I have to tell you."

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

"Do we go out or do we stay home and open a can of worms?"

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

"Look - I'm cold, you're cold. Why don't we settle down and start a family?"

'He said he wasn't good enough for me, so I married him because he's the first man to realize that.'

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."

Okay, I'll admit I was wrong. But I won't say what I was wrong about.

'When I said I would move mountains for you, it was just a figure of speech!'

Can we talk about our attorney-client relationship?