Relationship Dramatists Gifts

"I'll consider your proposal, but first I need a second opinion from your ex-wife."

"You owe me five bucks."

"I can't believe he brought her."

Henrik Ibsen,

"I'd like you to be the co-star in the melodrama that is life."

'The trouble with Nigel is that he's so changeable. One minute I love him and the next minute I loathe him.'

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, What do you think of younger men? -kl. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. Depends. Younger men have strong jaws and rock-hard abs, but they're missing the sexiest thing: they're not crotchety jerks, set in their ways, willing to argue about anything and say totally stupid things. Hey, doesn't that foul old wretch realize I've got rock-hard abs and a steel jaw?! (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-07-12)

No, it's not the beer talking. Beer actually makes a better impression than I do. ! !

"It's been over for a while now. I caught him trying to fertilize some catfish eggs in June."

"I know that on-line dating service claims a 90% success rate, but let's face it, Henry, we're in that other ten percent!"

'Another triple, Joe -I'm trying to forget several women.'

"I just wanted you to hear it from me first, before you read it in the sky."

'What a surprise,darling - a squatter!'

'Before you say anything, just let me change my Facebook status to ‘it's complicated'.'

"Don't walk away from me while I'm not paying any attention to you."

"I haven't finished saying no yet."

King being shouted at by Queen.

Lady with an inflatable dinner date.

It's a thin line between judge and chaperone, your honor. Try not to cross it. !

'I smell romance! This is his seventh blanket-bath. He only came in for an 'in-growing toe-nail' removal operation, yesterday!'

'Some day, son, all of this will be your ex-wife's.'

Preventing the Discovery of an Affair

Polly had Eunice so angry that she was tempted to break the fourth wall...

Let's get married in the morning...then if it doesn't work out, we haven't blown the entire day.

"Women! Am I right?"

Joe bids dolly good-bye

'Heath. . . Cliff!!!'

Wot's the row up the Court, Bill? Bob Smith was kissing my wife, and 'is old woman caught him.

"How did you come to the conclusion that some people are better suited for single life?"

"Oh super! Why do I always draw the short straw?!"

"The worst part is she was sleeping with the guy she had paid to kill me."

Victor Hugo looking at the stars