Relationship Dramatists Gifts

"I'll consider your proposal, but first I need a second opinion from your ex-wife."

"You owe me five bucks."

"I can't believe he brought her."

Henrik Ibsen,

"I'd like you to be the co-star in the melodrama that is life."

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

'The trouble with Nigel is that he's so changeable. One minute I love him and the next minute I loathe him.'

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

"I know that on-line dating service claims a 90% success rate, but let's face it, Henry, we're in that other ten percent!"

"It's been over for a while now. I caught him trying to fertilize some catfish eggs in June."

'Another triple, Joe -I'm trying to forget several women.'

"I just wanted you to hear it from me first, before you read it in the sky."

'Before you say anything, just let me change my Facebook status to ‘it's complicated'.'

'What a surprise,darling - a squatter!'

"Don't walk away from me while I'm not paying any attention to you."

"I haven't finished saying no yet."

Lady with an inflatable dinner date.

'I smell romance! This is his seventh blanket-bath. He only came in for an 'in-growing toe-nail' removal operation, yesterday!'

King being shouted at by Queen.

'Some day, son, all of this will be your ex-wife's.'

Let's get married in the morning...then if it doesn't work out, we haven't blown the entire day.

Joe bids dolly good-bye

Victor Hugo looking at the stars

"Women! Am I right?"

'Phil and I have kissed and made up.'

'Heath. . . Cliff!!!'

Preventing the Discovery of an Affair

Wot's the row up the Court, Bill? Bob Smith was kissing my wife, and 'is old woman caught him.

Polly had Eunice so angry that she was tempted to break the fourth wall...

"How did you come to the conclusion that some people are better suited for single life?"

"The worst part is she was sleeping with the guy she had paid to kill me."

"Oh super! Why do I always draw the short straw?!"