Reel Raconteur Pillows

"You bet I had it mounted, it gave me the best fight of my life."

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

"I can remember when a dollar was worth $47.32."

'Let's send her a text message; 'You're FIRED!''

'No.... My cat doesn't like being given pills either...'

Non Thought For The Day.

Coffee Shop and Battery Charging Station

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

'Are you blind ref?'

I'm a gangster rap fan too!

"I'll need a three iron."

"Do you have this in an $11.99?"

There is no limit to the amount of nonsense that men can talk about football.

'Bag? Any vouchers? Like a packer? If you have two of those... What type of apples are these?'

"But you got some good reviews too, yeah?"

How Platypuses Are Born

The world's oldest braided rug

Robot asking for money in bar code language.

Harold Was Done Asking Customers About Their Day

'Mister Nooka, taking over the frozen food division.'

"You misinterpreted the news. I've simply had a terrific autumn."

Crime and punishment - football.

'Sorry, the bag boy's down with the flu,'

Dear Diary...Royal Diary

'When did I first start rambling? Well, it's a long story...'

"My grant is somewhat restrictive. I have to work only with even numbers."

'Suspence, intrigue, deceit, vice...the annual report.'

'I get a lot of chit-chat type email gossip and I love to spread it around with a cellphone!'

Nethead strip: Long lost cousin

'Well yes there was life before television but it didn't amount to much. . .'

In their secret campaign to enslave humanity, the machines make their first big misstep with Artificial Sincerity.