Recruitment Sensation T-Shirts

"College basketball recruiters are after him."

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

Anna Calvi

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

"You're just the man we're looking for. Come around to this side of the desk, and I'll gather up my things and get the heck out of here."

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

Girl Band, "I wish you'd tell your mum we don't need her in the group!"

"OK, you're good and just the guy we need in security."

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

"That recruitment algorithm we’ve been using, I think we need to revisit it!"

"I've told you why I need a dog. Now suppose you tell me what makes you think you might be that dog."

"I have a Bachelor's degree from Columbia, an MBA from Stanford, six years experience, and I'm a hell of a mouser."

"I see by your resume that you're having trouble finding work because you pad your resume."

"Who's next?"

"Suppose you tell me why you want to be a faceless drone at Globatron Inc.?"

"I take it you got the lead in the school play."

Doughnut Making

"I'll put your application on file, Mr. Brandt, but I'm quite happy with my current paperweight."

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

"But what you call a track record I call ancient history."

Bessy had won the 100m sprint... but many suspected Steeroid abuse!

Impressive qualifications, but seeing as how I'm trying to fill the position I just fired you from...

'I think and work spectacularly well either inside or outside the box.'

"Again, you may exercise your right to remain silent, but it's going to work against you since this is a job interview."

Help wanted!...Ace Software, Inc...Video Game Tournament...Top 5 players get hired!

"Very impressive resume, however you didn't explain why you were tagged and released from your last job."

Your resume says you were a waiter...

"What are your other qualifications besides 'my daddy owns the company'?"

"HR think we need to look again at your recruitment strategy."

'It's a difficult position to fill. Someone who's smarter than me - and smart enough to pretend not to know it.'

"I'm long term unemployed because jerks like you won't hire me!"