Recovery Room Regular Gifts

"Would you like a post-surgery to-go box?"

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Spa

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

'These are job perks.'

Self-esteem room

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

Woman in hospital has i.v. attached to plant.

'Don't be alarmed if you hear the toilet flush a lot. Since you don't feel well, I thought I'd wash the dishes for you.'

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

'Not feeling well? Don't be silly - your EKG has outperformed the Dow.'

As a rule, all surprise parties start out with good intentions.

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

Saline Drip Sommelier.

"Hey, I got you a beautiful orchid to cheer you up until it turns into just a stick protruding from dirt."

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

"Yeah, my life flashed before my eyes!...OK, it was food - all the food I've ever eaten flashed before my eyes."

'Thanks, but I don't expect you to chew my food for me.'

"I'm sorry, Chuckles. We had to remove your funny bone."

"Friends have been scribbling on my cast."

Mimi's final scene

"The doctor was more lucid today! That's a good sign!"

"Grandmother, what big diastolic numbers you have."

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

"It says you need a CT scan and that the azaleas in the corner need to be watered twice daily."

'Ignore them, Charlie. They're nothing but philistines. I liked your poetry, truly I did!'

"Call me a taxi if I start foaming at the mouth."

"I'm sure he'll pull through. He's always been a real fighter."

'The food here isn't too bad, just try not to swallow !'