Recent Divorce Pillows

"I don't believe it. That's my ex-wife."

"Do any of you guys need a wife?"

Understanding The Other Side, Whether Men, Women, or Mice.

Marriage least expected to last...

'Two Mr. Wrongs don't make a Mr. Right.'

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

"You look quite presentable when you make the effort. Your ex-wife always told me you scrubbed up well."

"Don't make eye contact. Don't make eye contact. Don't...."

"Of all my husbands I believe the first one tasted the best."

"At this point, I think a rich lightweight would be fine."

"Wake up. It says here I was right about that thing I said."

'It'll get better, Vinny - my marriages always have a bad first quarter.'

"I need a man who will commit."

Months after she broke with the celery, Alice was still being stalked.

Bob tries to win her back with flowers.

The Princess and the Penis

'I'll relinquish most of my visitation rights if you'll just let Katie come over once in awhile to program my appliances.'

"I see a lot of Don Juan Complexes, but you're the first Don Knotts Complex I've come across."

Men in women's 101

'He has delusions of grandeur. He thinks I'm in love with him.'

"... and to my husband I leave f*** all!"

Dan, Carla's interests include brooding over failed relationships and fending off her mother's pleas for grandchildren. Carla, Dan is terrified of commitment and has a negative bank balance."

"My first husband was Roland, 'The Human Cannonball', .... and then one day he didn't go ballistic."

'I tried to feeding on demand - it led to divorce on demand.'

'I feel sorry for you single people. Nobody to go home to fight with.'

"Good morning, world!"

Boyfriend Shirt, Boyfriend Jeans. . . Boyfriend.

"Lover’s leap" "Wife toss"

...thirty-nine years young, recent divorcee, lifestyle includes a canine leitmotif....

"Have you got anyone on your books who's desperate and doesn't care what I look like?"

'Have you considered your x-height?'

'Listen to this one: 'Overweight, wrinkled skin, large ears and nose'... She sounds perfect!'

"When you're single, you're neither loved nor hated."

Gaydar Repair

"Same old, same old, men seem intimidated by a strong woman..."