Receiving A Ph.d. T-Shirts

'I need to borrow your Ph.D. for a half hour tomorrow. I have a major problem to solve.'

'I'm pretty sure I have a Ph.D. I think one came bundled with my new computer.'

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

Eternal Student.

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

Scientists are sexy

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

Graduates on their phones

Thank you for not doing research that has already been done.

'So you have a PhD, big deal, everyone working here has one! The question is, what can you really do?'

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

Ten Years to get the Ph.D

"An excellent defense. Let's give her the doctorate."

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

math faculty

Washington Crossing the Delaware, Having Been Invited to Join the Faculty at Princeton

"I totally meant to do that."

Macroscope

"Your research is impressive, but you have too many original ideas to be credible..."

"Doctor, your speech was certainly unabridged."

"Why do I always get stuck with being the guardian angel to someone who can't seem to finish his Ph.D.?"

"Where am I going to find the perfect thesis topic that hasn't been on TikTok already?"

PhD

'Dr Seuss is awarded a PHD.'

"Your doctoral thesis so much reminds me of mine. No, wait a minute. I never had a doctoral thesis."

"A Ph.D. in physics, experience in aerospace and rocketry...of course I can juggle."

"I buried my doctoral thesis in an unmarked grave. . . because, ultimately, you never know."

Some New Mortarboard Styles.

'It's kind of depressing: We've spent three years on this research paper, and probably only ten people in the World will ever read it...'

A Guide to Academic Gowns and Hoods

"I wrote my thesis in just one day. Is there something wrong with that?"

'Professor, Professor, the slaves are, I mean, the PhD students are revolting!'

"My doctoral thesis looks like a fake? Scandalous! I'll have a word with the bloke I bought it from!"

Doctorate Stand