Reality Ruminator Gifts

"I think...therefore I am. I think."

The end is not near - so cope!

The Thought Process.

'I'd think you'd be used to having a moat by now.'

Before putting on your armor...always check for mice!

Moustached gentleman

Gadzook used armour. Only one careful owner.

"Sheesh... Missed a button again."

'But sinister gales - with that armour?'

"In the room the women come and go. Talking of Michelangelo."

"If I go to the party alone, will I be able to leave when I want? But then, there's always the possibility that I will get stuck talking to someone. I can't shake the problem is me. What if no one else likes me? I'm the only one being critical... The issue is I'm not enough and it's really so huge." "The over thinker"

An incident from the Eglinton Tournament, scene 2.

'Hey, is that an official thing or did your mom give you that shirt?'

Knight using the men's bathroom.

"Sir George! How did it go with your jousting competition at the Renaissance Fair?"

A knight struggling to fit into his armour

"I really like smart women."

"May we have a moment, your honor. My client hasn't quite memorized the script."

'The secret to happiness is awaiting F.D.A. approval.'

'Have you got something that says, 'I've got a headache?''

"It's very convenient." - The 'must have' for a knight in the pub.

Knight relieving himself.

A cavalier gentleman.

"Anything to accompany a stale marriage?"

In Case of Accidents

A medieval knight eats his lunch with armored lunch gear.

"My psychiatrist advised me to pay taxes quarterly. That way my seething resentment is spread evenly over a year."

"I see you're on a date at the moment but perhaps later we could meet for a latte."

'Your 401k doesn't look a day over 20.'

"Just like he did when he was alive the lazy sod!"

'Gail, my dear, please don't talk about sex - my God this is a restaurant!'

'Yes, most humans call us pests or vermin, but a few of them love us as pets...'

"He doesn't seem to be accepting retirement too well."

"So make me an offer."