Real Estate Sleuth Pillows

'We finally got a response to our House For Sale sign. The wind blew it down.'

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

"So, the Scharfs have an atoll. Big deal."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

Ice Cream And Summer Rentals

'We'll take it!'

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

Mouse real estate!

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

'What makes you think the basement leaks?'

'New in town, hey? Let me show you a great condo tower.'

"It's a great Fixer-Upper and this is Ken, single, available and a pretty decent handyman."

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

Realty. Remember

"I know it's small and expensive, but wait till you see all the Pokemon."

'Yes, the walls ARE thin, but you'll be happy to know a world-famous rapper lives in the next unit.'

'It seems good, and he said the bit at the bottom is the name of the architect.'

'We're looking for a place with no high walls.'

'A free goldfish with every house you buy!'

'I see you have been mopping the floor while I was out. Are you doing this to be nice or disposing of evidence?'

Don't worry dear, he only bites untrustworthy morgage brokers!

"This is a lovely three bedroom detached property, with close proximity to Heathrow and the M25!"

"Admittedly, it is a bit of a 'fixer upper'."

Home 'Submerged' Home! (Home value less than mortgage).

"Not too big a garden-my wife tires easily!"

Man with head in ground: 'I'm not burying my head in the sand, I'm doing the coal mining search myself.'

'We have a cash flow problem too. Our problem is that your mortgage payments aren't flowing our way.'

'At least this means we won't need a coal mining search.'

"It has tremendous possibilities."

Show house. 'I don't like the house. but your champagne's great.'

'You're on the very bottom of the 'property ladder'. Or as we estate agents call it; 'the food chain'.'

Real Estate Life