Reading Self-help Pillows

A person trying to stop over-consuming, but not being able to find out how to.

Armstrong fired me. I kind of wish I knew why. Who cares why? A real alpha doesn't let himself get fired, little buddy. What you should've done was fire your boss before he had a chance to fire you. That way, thoughts of everything he'd lose would flood his brain and there's a 48.7% chance he'd actually beg you to stay. Isn't that the same number from your book "From Dump-ee to Beg-ee"? Work, romance ... it doesn't matter. All the relationships are the same.

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

Self help acupuncture

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

"Teach yourself what you don't know you don't know."

"I can motivate everyone except myself."

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

"What do you want to talk about first...the kleptomania or the hoarding?"

Relationship Warning Lights

Understanding The Other Side, Whether Men, Women, or Mice.

Window Treatment

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

"You've reached Randy the love doctor. What ails you?"

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

Bookstore, the Politically Incorrect Guide to You.

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

"You need to justify your own existence first."

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

"Yet she never gains an ounce."

Unhappy man with 'rabbit-ear' fingers behind his head.

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

'There is no past. No future. Only the present, which is changing every instant. Time is merely an illusion. Got it?'

"How can you expect anyone else to believe in you when you don't believe in yourself?"

"Commandments aren't really selling these days. However, we're willing to consider self-help tips or personal improvement ideas."

"I'm an oldest child trapped in the body of a middle child."