Reading About Crime Stories Mugs

Josh is an old-fashioned kinda guy.

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

The Philip Marlow family

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

'All right pal, just hand over the nose and nobody gets hurt.'

"Then leave the horses head in the Futon." Middle-class mafia

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'

"You're not grandma at all! In fact, I think this is a case of identity theft!"

'Why is it always about me?'

"Damn it—I told them I was too well known for undercover work!"

Dog detectives

Mafia Family Life: 'I'm sorry dear - but I had to bring some work home!'

The old good-cop, psycho-cop routine.

"By Ned, you're right, inspector—the body has been moved."

"Paper or plastic?"

"I did, boss, I swear, I buried him myself."

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

The Meeting

Cop Shop/Fake evidence/Plant now for spring.

Locking Up Crime

"It's a beautiful day except for the murders."

Trilby - 'Taffy was allowed to see Gecko'.

"Then I tried the move from business casual to white collar crime."

'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'