Rant Reader Prints

The Daily Fury

Letters escape from a caged book.

"Nevermore." "You don't have to use 'air quoths' every time."

Fear of news.

"I'm torn, Randy. I don't know what to think." "About what, little buddy?" "Star Trek. The last movie got rave reviews. Critics and audiences loved it. Therefore, I loved it too. But it didn't come anywhere close to earning $1 billion at the box office. And these days, any movie that doesn't earn $1 billion is a complete failure. Therefore, I must hate it. I'm in limbo until the hive mind comes to a consensus." "Except for honey, nothing good ever comes from hives."

'Is there a psychiatrist in the house - the cast is very depressed over opening night reviews!'

'Social and political revolution? Check out our 'Do It Yourself' section.'

Man reading 'Bankruptcy for Dummies'.

"When in the course of human events it becomes... Oh, blast it! Adams is just going to edit the heck out of this..."

A new book with a little bit of this and a little bit of that.

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

'Oooh! My cousin got a 5 star review! What's it say?'

'Read any good book reviews lately?'

Moanathon.

"You'll find all the adult 'Dummies and Idiots' guide books in the children's section."

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."

'Would sir like to start with the hors d'oeuvres, or just go to the main corpse?'

Castaway reading a magazine from a bottle

'All the fourth grade guys took a blood oath not to learn anything during the summer.'

Success Without Effort

'Before we begin may I emit a prolonged rant about my work week?

Mao Zedong.

'I'm hoping he'll move onto another subject...'

"You've really got to read this book, it's full of dynamite ideas!"

"Animal Liberation by Peter Singer"

"They should open the files - Lenin never said all those crazy things attributed to him."

"Feel free to imagine you might have any of the conditions you read about in the magazines."

'I thought I'd just crease a few book spines while I catch up on my soaps.'

"Sorry - we don't stock religious titles in case it offends some of our customers."

Mayakovskiy V.V.

Online Agitation