Raccoon Whisperer Mugs

"Did you remember to take the trash in?"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"Quick, start the car!"

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

Dog Dreams

'Your shoe's untied.'

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

'You know too much!'

'Don't bite it.I have to check Daddy next.'

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

The Worm Charmer

"That is an outrageous slur."

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

"...and that growl has turned many a hunter into vegetarians!"

'The forest is so dark and gloomy: It's nice to reach the emergence and get a bit of sunshine...'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"This never happened."

"Looking at you, the moon and beyond, don't you think we could start a blog?"

"Do you like it better when I go to the F or the Dm?"

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

'Humans are so considerate: They put perches like these for us on every one of their houses...'

'Can you play something the dog doesn't know?'

Sign in Lion Enclosure: 'Please Don't Eat the People.'

"Look. They say sit, you sit. They say roll over, you roll over. Where's the prob?"

"Hm, still sky high. Let's try the other arm."

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'