Quirky Visionaries Gifts

Guy in Opthamology Store Room getting Evil Eyeballs.

Wine-O-vision

Albert Einstein

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

Illogic Tree

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

The earlier, less publicized discovery of gravity by Corblatt.

"How about this? We carpet the road and use the resultant static electricity to power our electric cars."

Lost and Profound.

"He's really excited about this new proposal to let staff take over services."

'It had taken some time, but the finding of a spaghetti junction brought immense satisfaction.'

'Like us, the Hula Hoop will never go out of style.'

'Well, son... I've made my first million by selling my unpaid bills to the paper-recycling guy!'

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

'Don't worry...you'll grow into them.'

'You have a 9:00 A.M. appointment with your ophthalmologist to check your vision and a 11:00 A.M. appointment with the staff to rally the troops around your vision.'

"Is this speech pie-in-the-sky nonsense or aspirational?"

'Dr. Nackschmerz has a very logical mind.' - 'Yes - in contrast to his body.'

'It says here you like to push the envelope.'

Groucho Glasses Eye Test

'Agghh...I've done something practical, taken up by industry...and I've been thrown out of the Mad Scientist Club!'

'I-need-bifocal-itis.'

A pop-up book author suffering from Folder's Block.

"What do you have to do to get business class?"

'your hindsight is only 20400 so I'm going to fit you with a pair of 'retro specs'.'

'…and then I invented ‘prong-less' barbed wire…'

Before the Salivating Dogs

'Yes, we can easily place a gallon of Rocky Road in with your husband.'

Speech bubble showing EUREKA! back to front.

Eureka!

'Well, that answers that age-old question. According to the tape, the chicken came first. . . which brings up another age-old question: is the last one a rotten egg?'

"Wouldn't it be easier to get one of those pregnancy testing kits from the chemiost, Julie?"

"Jack and Nina's concern grew when their son, James, confided in them that his imaginary friend was, in fact, a short-tempered snapping turtle."