Quirky Shopkeeper Pillows

Cash-For-Soul Shop

SALE

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

Unfinished Funiture Store.

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

Stationery Shop

'I'm sorry, sir, but our happy hour doesn't start for another fifteen minutes.'

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.

"Okay, lets see what we have here."

Unusual Offers

Where Ignorance is Bliss.

"I'd say business was brisk."

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

SupermarketAwful Market.

'Triple-headed razors?... Aisle seven.'

Smoke and Mirrors: Harold couldn't work out why his new store wasn't getting any customers.

'Please enter your pin now.'

'Buy two pounds and I'll throw in the sword.'

"Are you mad with us, Mrs. Bimmelman?"

'Where do you keep the elbow-grease?'

'Uh-oh.'

"Ah! I see you've found a cold beer to your liking, sir."

Jumble Sale

Organic foods stand manned by stallholder using fly spray.

"Ooh look, the high street's evolved to survive!"

It's an I-O-Ewe.

'But what do you sell?'

Down on Her.

Marketing - Learn from customers' buying patterns...