Quirky Reality Lover Pillows

A crooked guy looking normal in a fun house mirror.

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"You left this on our ship."

'I'll be darned! A nipple mood ring!'

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

"I love you, you big fool."

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

Pastry Hat

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

Why Cupid is not allowed to drink alcohol anymore...

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

'Can I have flies with that'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"Daddy is off to work in a data mine."

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

'It's a giant inkblot on loan from the psychiatrist who owns the unit next door.'

Sir Isaac Newton wondered how he couldexplain this! (Pineapple)

Who knew grass migrates?

Cow Cong vs Toilet Rolls.

Snapshots in Time

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

Waiter in resturant sawing violin.

Toenail clipping missile.

"Barnes is morphing into some kind of strange creature. I warned him about eating out of the vending machines."

'There's a software glitch. The drones have built a hive and are trying to make honey.'