Quirky Real Estate Enthusiasts T-Shirts

'In return for storing the nuclear waste, we get a big break on the mortgage.'

'And this is the insomnia room.'

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

An exaggeration of estate agents

Mouse real estate!

"The sellers had a lot of kids, so they got tired of running out of hot water. So they upgraded."

Estate Agents: Executive Homes

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

"The roof is old and leaks. The good news is when it rains you'll get an additional 3 showers."

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

'Is the fire included?'

Home 'Submerged' Home! (Home value less than mortgage).

'Here's the 2 acres of beachfront property you bought - too bad it's only six inches wide.'

"The current owners removed a number of walls and used soft, neutral tones to create a very spacious, open concept."

"No pressure, but I do have another couple who are very interested."

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have troubles with those in the back yard.'

Real estate.

Coming Soon- Trump Circle

'The previous owner broke his leash ...I mean, lease.'

"It's a bit of a fixer-upper."

Yes. This is definitely a house. The Housing Authority closes another tough case.

'For sale: Igloo w/attached 2 snowmobile garage.'

"Let's see - you might be just right for a little 2-turret, 1 1/2 moat unit I'm renting on West 58th street."

"I'm looking for something with more closet space."

'When you described it as a remote house in the country...'

'It's okay, there's a six-figure carpeting allowance.'

Nijinsky Moving Company . Ballet dancers.

'This is built on an historic location. It was the first garbage dump in the country.'

"It's fine - you know, it's a moon."

An Englishman's home is his sand castle.

'He predicts home prices will go up this year? Yeah, and if I go outside every morning and predict rain, eventually I'll be right, too.'

"... It's a housing bubble."

'That house is a fixer upper. Are you handy with a checkbook?'