Comical Real Estate Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Here's the 2 acres of beachfront property you bought - too bad it's only six inches wide.'

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

Tidy it up for the open house, and it wouldn't hurt to put out some freshly regurgitated worms. For sale.

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

An exaggeration of estate agents

Mouse real estate!

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

'Someday, Son, all this will be your ex-wife's.'

'Now from this room you can get a great view of the whales going by!'

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'

Estate Agents: Executive Homes

"Efficiency tombs available"

"The high price is due to the great view of the beach."

'Is the fire included?'

"Come climate change, you could find yourself sitting beach-front on the French riviera."

"We figured why not make some money while we migrate south."

"As president of the tenants' association, I have to inform you that our list of grievances has been eaten."

"Every once in a while this house comes with a pool."

'It mostly scares the realtors.'

"For sale £470,000 house included"

"The current owners removed a number of walls and used soft, neutral tones to create a very spacious, open concept."

"Yes, it's nice, but it's lost twenty per-cent of its value in the past year."

"No pressure, but I do have another couple who are very interested."

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have troubles with those in the back yard.'

'Three words doc, why you should buy...dislocation,dislocation,dislocation.'

Coming Soon- Trump Circle

Real estate.

'I'm so glad I moved into this basement flat Mary. It's put me on the property ladder and the neighbours are so friendly!'

"It's a bit of a fixer-upper."

'The previous owner broke his leash ...I mean, lease.'

'Cosy little kitchen, isn't it?'