Quirky Humor Hunter T-Shirts

'What? When you cross a bloodsucker with a pair of antlers? A moose-quito!'

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

'The circle is complete!'

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

'Okay, is there anybody else whose homework ate their dog?'

A tortoise toboggans down a hill in its shell

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"You left this on our ship."

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

Yeah, it's funny, but you'll see, in this house, it's the guy who screams the loudest...

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

Odd Angles,a monthly strip on coarse angling.

"Walk, hell- I gotta dance."

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

'But you know I don't have brand loyalty for anyone but you!'

"I don't know what else we can do. He won't look up from the screen!"

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

Glance Exchange

"Do you see that inexplicably beautiful hydrangea over there?… Nature calls."

'What? You ate the gateau instead of throwing it into my face?? You insensitive, egotistical brute! You don't love me anymore!'

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'