Quirky Dining Fans Pillows

"I trust this will be on one check."

Waffle house, International House of Pancakes and Halfway House for Wayward Toast

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

Slices of bread rescuing burnt toast.

Sheep In Curlers

Would you make up your mind? I can't keep letting you in and out all day.

"What's happened to Quiche?"

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

Open House of Horrors

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

Don't tell my wife. Dragon head.

"How about a little more coffee?"

Steam from dinner in restaurant forms dollar sign

"I could have sworn I had three sausages!"

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

The water desk

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

'Right you lot, listen. Hands up for soup. . .'

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

"We're out of flowers."

Nouveau wine

'At these prices can't you afford a kitchen?' Burner at the table

Mice 25¢

'Sorry about that - Lenny accidentally used jumping beans.'

"It tastes and smells just like a glass of wine!"