Quirky Companionship Appreciator T-Shirts

"We have to stop meeting like this – people are starting to talk ‘psychiatric ward.’"

"I love you, you big fool."

Your spirit animal is a balloon poodle? My spirit animal is a balloon poodle!

"The saving grace of living with someone who has AD/HD is that any arguments you have over it never last very long."

"I guess people want dogs with no problems. Lucky for me, all I've got is quirks."

'Yes, Super-Supreme pizza... Delivered please...'

"I'm gona level with you, Judith, I've spent some time in the pen."

"The words 'complete screwball' are not in my vocabulary."

'Oh Gloria, I love you with all my heart, part of my liver and most of my lower intestine.'

The songwriter who wrote a bridge about his bridge.

"What a coincidence! I enjoy sleeping and running around the house for no reason, too."

"Sometimes Ben does very dumb things. I love that in him."

"Hi, I'm Miranda: I like sniffing bums, rolling about in dead things and chasing tennis balls. . ."

Sinlge-white-male seeking single-female who enjoys, silence, long long walks, and scorpions.

Love is Love

"It's our fault. We put out milk & cookies and now we can't get rid of him."

"Why can't you just read in bed?"

"You must be a computer geek, because I've never had anyone ask me to accept their 'Terms of Use' before a date."

Miss Lonelyhearts Advice to the Lovelorn

'Please tell me you aren't my roommate.'

'And to think that only yesterday I was a lonely scientist and you were a failed experiment!'

"I'm a funny little person so I'm looking to adopt a funny little dog. Do you have one?"

"Do you know how distracting it is when you spin the chamber on that revolver?"

Chameleon.

"I'd like something home reared, then meat for the lion, well done, no blood understand? The scarecrow has a seed intolerance and that guy over will eat anything out of a tin."

"It's not a sexual thing - I just enjoy dressing up in sheep's clothing."

"No-one nit picks like you..."

Tortoise Falls In Love With A Football.

"What they hell are we looking at."

"I'll admit, he may be a bit odd, maybe even creepy. But, he is hands down the best bell ringer we've ever had."

'I know you're a deadly sin and everything, but I don't know...I still like hanging around with you anyway.'

Ask Sadie. I'm anxious to have a companion. When will this happen? -Ron from Chicago. *Actual reader questions. Ron, what a coincidence. I am also looking for a companion. Do you give foot rubs, clean the house, do what you're told and keep your frisky hands to yourself?! Your search is over, sweetie bear. Ask Sadie at asksadieshow@gmail.com

This gentleman would like to take his bird to see Alcatraz.

Graves: Ernest Moss Ventriloquists. . . 'Georgie'

'Oh yeah. . . she's the one that has a great personality.'