Quirky Cat Clothing Pillows

"He thought he'd stand out more in a body suit."

The practical psychopath

Hats and Food

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

"Honestly sometimes I'd like to pretend I don't know you!"

That very night in Frank's office a forest grew.

"What SPF sunscreen do you suggest for lying around in a sunny spot?"

'This next song is about waking up your owner when's it's time to eat. It's called 'Butt in the Face.''

Victoria's secret lovers: Barry, Al, Percy.

"The fancy dress store ran out of crutches."

'Man in suit wears tie in shape of a pencil.'

101 uses of a dead cat: civilisation flag.

Cat's Pajamas

'My cat is very unpredictable. I never know when he's going to ignore me.'

Cockroach Costume

"I'd like to report some bad guys."

Kangaroo Pocket

"Cool shirt."

'I accidentally flipped onto my back and couldn't get up. That's the last time I wear a turtleneck.'

"Where do you get such nice fruit this time of year?"

'I didn't have time to do my laundry last night, sir, so I just wore sticky notes today.'

#1 Jerk-off

Extreme Makeover.

"Thinking outside the box? You bet I am!"

"Everything on the menu is locally sourced."

"I have a B.A. in indifference, an M.A. in obstinacy and I'm currently working on my doctorate in defiance."

"This app alerts me when I'm being selfish, unsocial or temperamental. I need to change my personality, because it alerts me every minute of the day."

'Yes, the old lady left me all her worldly wealth. But what I really wanted was her liver.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Millman's Dead Cat Museum and Curio Shop

'She can't handle fish funerals.'

Watch Your Coat.

Fears

101 uses of a dead cat: saw