Quirky Business Analyst T-Shirts

Snake charmer tries to improve the sales report.

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

'The bad news is you're going to marry a geek, and not a pro athlete. The good news is the geek owns the team.'

"As you can see, our corporate structure is turtles all the way down."

For the last time, Bobby, I told you – every other person gets the red cup with the placebo. Lemonade 50¢.

"Why didn't we think of that?"

Cat Boss

'We'll talk later, Ed, but for now we have a quick and dirty solution to your objections.'

'Stick and Carrot Business Incentive Consultants.'

'The action next week is going to be in bird seed, but if you quote me, I'll deny I said it.'

"I've built this business up from scratch. . . "

"Alfresco Plumbing & Hardware Supplies"

"Excuse me...but there are hairs in my soup. I think we should be supportive when our friends open a business. But sometimes I wonder...what are they thinking?"

Snow cones being sold in a snow globe.

"Retirement will be a pipe dream for many of us...we need to explore new careers for later life."

"My tech-support is a lot better than my hot dogs."

"Damn it, Bershire, I've told you to never call me when I'm in my executive ball pit!"

Snow Cones 50 Cents - self serve.

"I trademarked my name, so now you'll need to pay me to use it."

"When I suggested to corporate that we make our meetings more fun, I was hoping for more than just holding them in a sandbox."

The spirit of creative challenge is the driving force of our corporate philosophy.

"For the last time, Bellows, it's stomp stomp clap, we will, we will rock. Now, from the top..."

'As you may know, I'll retire in a few weeks but you better not think that I'm a lame duck now!'

'Damn - that was my idea.'

The Niche Economy

Hot dog vendor is struck by a new business strategy...Grilled Bankers.

Bob's Window Washing and Private Investigator!

'Remember when we used to like having a real hands on CEO?'

"If there's discrepancies in my tax returns, don't blame me. Blame the guy in the alley I paid $20 to do them."

Lemonade 50 cents - Smokers Welcome!

Taxidermy and Exotic Meats.

"I guess this is about as hostile as we can make this takeover."

"Where are you going with this, Wingate?"

'Our acquisitions department accidentally took over a third world country.'

Hoping to compete with the Mayo Clinic: Miracle Whip Medical Clinic