Quirky Banter Lovers Prints

BEEEP! Where did that come from? It's happening every couple of minutes. It's making me very angr

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"You left this on our ship."

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

Astral Projection

Blind man walking a tortoise.

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

"Fresh pepper?"

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

I thought I was proposing to Sally, but evidently I was challenging her to a twenty year series of debates.

Newark by Night. A new Dutch restaurant just opened. What do you know about Dutch cuisine? Nothing. But I'm a big fan of the "Dutch Treat" concept.

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

He wanted a different one.

"Daddy is off to work in a data mine."

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

"Not tonight. The furniture is sentient again."

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

'Can I have flies with that'

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

So You've Cloned Yourself

'It's a giant inkblot on loan from the psychiatrist who owns the unit next door.'

'If you must know, yes, I do sometimes fake purring.'

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

An Archeologic Dig

Updated fairy tales - "Cinderella." Dating Service. It's not often we get a client looking for a specific shoe size.

Cow Cong vs Toilet Rolls.

Fat Kid 14- Gets re-animated

"Barnes is morphing into some kind of strange creature. I warned him about eating out of the vending machines."

Litter Tray Stonehenge