Quilt Master T-Shirts

"It's a lot of work, but a quilt lasts forever."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

Counting ribs

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

Braiding a Horse's Tail

"Yo, Eunice – don’t leave me hangin’."

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

I quilt therefore I am

T-Bones STEAK House...NO sissy salad bar!...Heimlich expert always on duty'

"You're turn to grill tonight Adam, you make the best ribs."

"Tommy!"

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

'Steak Ted?'

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

Desert Island BBQ

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

'Your fancy new grill works great. . .and we didn't even have to turn it on.'

His New Grillfriend

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

Filet minion

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

Ode to a Grill

"Okay - who wants theirs well done?"

"You like yours well done, right?"

Burnt or Raw?

"They make an awfully big thing of cookouts."

'Men's cooking'

'The TZ90C with triple boosted propane burners and a titanium mesh grill with carbon fibre casings is the only way to guarantee that genuine back to nature outdoor flavour.'

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

"Over millions of years, carbon turns to diamond. Yet it took dad plus his grill mere minutes to turn last night's marinated chicken into that carbon."

"He was sent here from the future to terminate me, but then he really got into grilling."