Queuing Humor Lover Pillows

'Wait a minute...did you just cut in line?'

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"You left this on our ship."

'I used to commute. Now I transform.'

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

Blind man walking a tortoise.

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

"Fresh pepper?"

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

"Daddy is off to work in a data mine."

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"Not tonight. The furniture is sentient again."

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

'Can I have flies with that'

'It's a giant inkblot on loan from the psychiatrist who owns the unit next door.'

So You've Cloned Yourself

Toenail clipping missile.

Cow Cong vs Toilet Rolls.

Sir Isaac Newton wondered how he couldexplain this! (Pineapple)

"Barnes is morphing into some kind of strange creature. I warned him about eating out of the vending machines."

Fat Kid 14- Gets re-animated

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

Clearing the castle's moat.

Dogs looking at a fire hydrant in an art gallery.