Quacker Tracker Pillows

'And when you're flying South...avoid Peking.'

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"Elementary, my dear Quackson."

Inflatable Duck Boat

"What do you think is a good step goal for someone who's just started walking?"

Explorer with enormous magnifying glass.

Lyme Disease Research Lab

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

'If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, it' actually a gene-modified flounder.'

"Honesty, I saw a train yesterday"

'Weird ... the footprints just seem to end right here.'

'Sure, long waits don't bother you. You've served time.'

My fitness tracker said I was dead but I thought I'd better get a second opinion

'Well you certainly walk like a duck and quack like a duck.'

'Dinosaur footprints!'

'There's something about that Indian scout I don't trust.'

'We'll put our horses in 'Do Not Track' mode by going through this stream bed.'

'OK, now I'm freaked out. How'd he get my cell phone number?'

"I haven't slept well since you pointed out that these modeling sessions are a form of betrayal."

'Maybe you just can't have hope and change at the same TIME.'

'Tell me. How many acupuncture treatments did doctor Wing give you?'

'Took me all night to write that message.'

"It's okay, I'm actually just a flamboyantly-costumed osteopath."

'To tell you the truth I don't what it is.'

Abrupt end to Red Feather's scouting career.

"Decaf. They can't be far away."

"Eww! A tick!"

"Forget 10,000 steps. I've programmed it to help me reach 10,000 dollars a day."

"How the hell does he do that?"

'The tracks are getting fresher. He's close by.'

'Bear tracks! I'd say, two days old.'