Purebred Ponderer T-Shirts

'Are you sure its a purbred?'

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

'Yak, yak, yak.'

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

"I'm not a mad dog. But I'm not particularly happy either."

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

How do you fell about buying your own health insurance?

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

"You've got to understand, in my family Dad was the poodle and Mom was the pit bull."

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

'When they start calling you a splendid bird, you know you're in trouble.'

'No, I'm not into astronomy. That telescope is for you to see your new parking spot.'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

"Turned out he wasn't a miniature."

"Yes, there will be questions but you're unquestionably the nation's most badass mom."

The mysterious world of ligand substitution

Fish Food

Dr. McPhee discovers the Embarrassment Particle.

"Who's next?"

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'We don't have a health plan, but we have a very nice cemetery right out in the churchyard.'

"Hello! - Have you ever thought about changing your energy supplier..?"

Physicists at the Fourth Grotschlov Conference assembled to determine once and for all if light is a wave or a particle.

"Obviously, somebody screwed up somewhere."

"Your grass looks great."

"What d'you say we try sneaking out before the last one?"

"I wonder if he's talking to me?"

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.