Pundit Jesters Mugs

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

Beer Order

'I gotta admit - this 'jury by my peers' idea of yours is looking pretty good.'

'In this next precedent, an attorney lost his frivolous lawsuit complaint and his opponent then filed a frivolous 'frivolous lawsuit' lawsuit.'

'Don't hesitate to critize me, Herb, whenever I think I am wrong.'

"I'd like an application form for the position of minister, please!"

"'Article I. Section 9. Claus B. No title of nobility shall be granted by the United States' - we gotta change that."

"You know very well what fish!"

"You're making a complete ass of yourself, Rodney!"

'My client asserts that walking on land was his idea and he therefore claims 50% of all subsequent profits.'

"When you take the oath don't worry. There's a lightning rod on the roof."

'Look, Your Honor -- We're both over-fifty white males, right?'

'We, the jury, find the defendant guilty... and his attorney obnoxious.'

'He said his first buzz word today!'

'We're ready to order... ORDER!'

Pumping up wig in blender.

"Psst! If you have any stock tips to pass on, I can probably lighten your sentence for insider trading."

Rugby oldies

"Okay, we've donated to the Food Bank, Feed the Hungry, Food for Life, Hunger Helpers, Starving World, Second Helpings. . . is anyone else getting hungry?"

Donald Trump's Flying Circus

"Your honor, I'd like to request a new defense attorney!"

'The prisons are overcrowded, so why don't you just drop and give me fifty push-ups?'

Oval Office

"The jury will disregard the defendant's statement that he will donate 100% of his criminal earnings to the Concerned Mobsters for Eritrea Fund!"

Tercentary of Shakespeare's Birth

'I've just had a terrible nightmare that we were living sensibly, within our budget!'

'The justice will be swift - the attorney fees, swifter.'

"The business of crime DOES pay. It pays our salaries!"

'Your honor, we find the defendant not guilty, but we sure wouldn't let our daughters go out with him!'

'Our plea will be innocent by reason of insanity.'

While we watched the Trump circus... In the middle of the night the GOP controlled Congress took away your right to hold the big banks accountable when they rip you off!

Where legal teams but their outfits.