Pun-loving Sports Fans Pillows

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

"Slugger goes yard!!!"

The best goalie in the world!

'Here we go again...'

'Don't get up. ... I've got it!'

'Five seconds! ...Four ...Three ...Two ...One ...SPRING!!'

Golf escape.

"Cricket...six minutes of excitement crammed into six hours!"

"Hey Kevin! Care to enter the office football pool!"

"Twenty seven shots, first hole. I think we'll call that a dodo."

"Oh, come on ref. How can you not see that?!"

'Will you lean on the other post for awhile, please?.'

'The Ref gave out 4 yellow cards, 2 reds and 7 Valentine cards.'

Table Tennis ball-boys

"I feel like I play better on clay."

'Wanna play? We need another body... er... one more player.'

Egads. I've forgotten what the rule is about a runner throwing a leg to base ahead of himself.

False starts.

'Listen,kid, you're going to have to lower your standards if you ever want to throw the sleazeball.'

Modern Football

'I know Joe's sight isn't all that but the captain's not going to like it.'

'Time is running out - shoot! Everyone is starting to keel over and die!!'

'I believe you want some fencing done at the bottom of your garden?'

Sports update: Some teams won and some teams lost.

'Promise me. Never again. Don't ever get sheared right before a fight.'

'That's three strikes. You're Out!'

"Then I said, let's stay with Santa's sleigh, but nooo ... you wanted to see a Rangers game!"

Whack the author.

'CSI: Basketball.'

'No doubt about it... serves are MUCH faster these days!'

"Your fastball is just hanging and your curve isn't breaking at all. What you should do is take an analgesic with some pain-relieving anti-inflammatory ingredients for a few days."