Pun-loving Gardener T-Shirts

"If we make it greener on this side of the river, the wildebeests will cross here..."

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

Planting seeds in garden - broad beans and jelly beans.

"I see you also took the road less travelled!"

'And if you squeeze snapdragons just like this, it sort of looks like they're biting something.'

'I've had so many transplants, I feel like a garden nursery.'

Onion Guillotine

The beautiful but deadly 'Venus dog trap'.

Hydroponic Gardening

"You're a gifted writer, although at times you're just too precious."

Wet weather footwear - shoes that are shaped like boats.

Flytrap nerd.

"I can't believe I went so long without A.C."

"I stopped singing to my plants! I've never had one say 'shaddup!' before!"

Man in the stocks on his typewriter.

Even garden plants like to visit.

'Joe said he had some special bulbs.'

'I borrowed Timmy's model plane to crop dust the garden.'

'I thought I'd try making marmalade. Do we have any marmals?'

"You'll get three meals a day,but they will all be continental breakfast."

Say it with cacti

'Fly me straight over the bears, James...'

'Try not to sit still for too long dear, the convulvulus is really rather virulent.'

Northern Ireland Garden Centre - Seeds of Democracy: Might not blossom.

'I've told you before, I don't like broccoli.'

"Bloody cowslips!"

Gardening for Beginners - 'Carnivorous plants don't like dog biscuits, I'm afraid!'

"I don't get it. Mom's stupid vegetables are growing but the gumdrops I secretly planted haven't done anything."

Flower pot tries to escape to the next balcony.

"I think you'd better switch the water feature off."

"Wouldn't this one look nice shrivelled up in the kitchen?"

November: Your lawn will have stopped growing now.