Publishing Debut Pillows

Knowing your audience

"As your first novel, it starts out badly and just falls away!"

"I just got a huge advance for my first novel. It's about a writer who gets a huge advance for his first novel."

Sumo Love.

'As is the fashion these days, it's about nothing.'

"It's a first novel about the brutal murder of a publisher who refused to publish the first novel of a..."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

First Novels.

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

Gay Times...

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"If I 'HAD IT ALL' it would it be enough?"

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

Silly wig.

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

'As a famous writer, could you do something to help jumpstart my career?'

In a world where spelling doesn't count.

Madame Rejane- Famous French Actress in the Part of Madame Sans Gene

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

"So start throwing together about 10 novels a week and bring them in on Wednesdays."

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."