Public Transit Navigator Gifts

"Will this take me where I want to go, no questions asked?"

"If I ever make a phone call from a bus, do something about me."

Someday, when my ship comes in, we won't have to take the bus

Thru versus Through Traffic

Doug had trouble getting home at a decent hour.

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

"Manhatten Brooklyn Hoboken Long Island"

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

Planned service changes

SF NO

'Whoa! This was supposed to be an easy merit badge!'

'Guess they're still fixing the street.'

'We're very tight on space right now but we'll have you in an office as soon as we can. Meanwhile. . .'

'Turn right at the Robinia pseudoacacia, pass the garden with the salvia officinalis, cross the road when you see the stranvaesia davidinia and the pub is on the left!'

A house being demolished in order to make way for a road widening scheme, with the occupants being evicted.

'Ahh...I see you travelling far and wide on a long fruitless mission but you still can't find a town centre parking space this Christmas...'

"Oh come on mate. I thought you said that you'd done the knowledge!"

"And then bear left at the war memorial, first right down Newton road and St Luke's is straight ahead."

'We could use a little divine guidance right about now, reverend.'

SF NO

Getting Closer

'Sorry mate, you'll have to ask someone else, I'm not from this area ...'

Cars.

Rodin's Tram Driver

'I asked my mom to drive me to school because the bus doesn't have airbags.'

'The train due to arrive at platform 2 will now arrive at platform 19.'

Road Construction.

The Last of the Passenger Pigeons

Man sees line of priests entering Mass Transit Authority.

"Before kindergarten, I was into that whole downtown nursery-school scene."

Commuter reads book entitled: Commuters for Dummies.

"I was born an urban bird and I'll die an urban bird."

"Yes, we've been lost before, but never this lost."

- 'Have you a map of London Underground?' - 'Try the basement!'