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Attention Deficit Disorder Anonymous.

"Which brings us to my next point."

Gerald sensed that more than just his reputation was riding on the success of the presentation.

'Wow, excellent turnout.'

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

'There are no stupid questions, so let's also agree there are no stupid answers.'

'I'm now going to open the floor to questions.'

'And now I would like to depart from my prepared text...'

'...so the Marketing Department suggested I try a slide presentation.'

"First, I want to give you an overview of what I will tell you over and over again during the entire presentation."

'I don't understand your question. Could you restate it as an answer?'

The speech was almost interesting. People began to sit up and fake interest.

How to deliver a successful presentation.

Harvesting the wind: 'Blah, blah, blah. . .'

'Leadership training.'

"How's my presentation? Call 1-800-..."

Long Lecture.

'I have identified 240 stages of organizational change. Before I discuss them, coffee anyone?'

'You were talking in your sleep again.'

Presentation skills.

'I'm going to begin with a joke so we can get the humor out of the way.'

"I'm so nervous! I feel like you're all in my stomach."

"My platform can be summarized in a single word: Leadership!"

Lecture on Chaos Theory delayed because the speaker dropped his notes.

Well done, Jim. If only I could sleep at home like I do through your presentations!'

PowerPointless Presentation

For More Effective Presentations Avoid Excessive Bullet Points.

Man giving a talk but only a dog is listening.

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

'Dang, I forgot my notes!'

'It's important to be prepared for those unfortunate downturns in the market.'

Buddy believed that successful presentations began with the entrance.

Nervous man about to make a presentation.

'I'm going to switch to plan 'B'. Our computers are down.'