Pub Name Aficionado Gifts

'It used to be called 'the Fox and Hounds'.'

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

Back to school.

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

"Two vegans, please."

"Wow, what a DILF."

"Want to find out if you're also king of the swamp?"

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

Ye Old Cafe: No Coffee Today - Sore Arm!

'I had to stamp down on staff using nicknames at work. They even had one for me!'

"I'm surprised at you, Ted. You know we're not allowed to serve alcoholic beverages to dogs."

"You call this ice?"

J.P.Hensmore Superintendent AKA Head Honcho, The Big Guy,The Man, Numero Uno and The Big Cheese.

'We don't have anyone here by that name. Was he perhaps using one of his aliases?'

"Sinead?!"

'My programmer doesn't understand me.'

'My other baby is Mercedes'

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

"Obviously, sir, it's a very discerning, vegetarian fly."

"To maintain proper respect for management, you have to call me 'Boss Joey!' Unless, you know, you don't want to."

"A high forhead can often be a sign that they've stolen a really big brain."

'The bar association barred me from going before the bar...So I came to a bar.'

'If that's Dorothy, we're not here.'

"Hypochondriac's handbook. A little passion project I'm working on;, or, rather, I would be working on."

All kidding aside, let me explain why I get to call you Al, yet you have to call me Dr. Kapuchnik. It's simply because I'm a psychiatrist and you're a bum. It's nothing personal. Thanks for explaining. I feel better.

"Yoga has helped me appreciate the healing power of donuts."

Mine Host.

"Pretty label... shiny bottle... I'll take it!"

'Agreed, 'Laplace Algebra Matrix Expansion' is a good topic, but we'd better find a better acronym if we want to secure a Research Grant...'

England.

No Dogs.

'Now that I'm King, no more of that 'Eddie' stuff, Mom.'

Party Party!