Pub Aficionado Pillows

Mine Host.

Skiers speed down mountain towards pub. One says: 'Fancy a swift one?'

Beer...Nothing beats a great pair of kegs.

'I see you back there!'

England.

No Dogs.

'I thought you were going to build a raft with that driftwood!'

Pub Quiz - Haven't you all got homes to go to ?

'It only takes one drink to make me drunk, ususally the ninth or tenth...'

Bar - Now serving 24 Hours - Customer to bar man - 'I want to get as wasted as you look'.

'Cheer up...'

'My programmer doesn't understand me.'

The last pub that's not a restaurant in England

'I took my wife to the tunnel of love...She told me to wait outside.'

The Nudists' Tavern - Pubic Bar.

'That surveillance camera...your wife put it in.'

"Listen Dave. I want a walk. You want to go to the pub. I think we can cut a deal here."

"I once dated an archaeologist - but all she kept doing was digging up the past. . ."

"Can't it wait until after happy hour?"

Alcohol Ingredients

"I'm surprised at you, Ted. You know we're not allowed to serve alcoholic beverages to dogs."

"It's important to get those drinks to those who need them the most."

"Ha ha, very funny. But seriously … there’s a pub at the top?"

"A high forhead can often be a sign that they've stolen a really big brain."

A clown walks into a bar with a sign that reads "Funny Hour 5:00 to 6:00 pm".

"It was going to be a very rough year but fortunately I was able to terminate the elves pension plan."

"In a sense, yes, I'm guilty."

"I'm sorry, Miss, but I'll have to ask you for some proof of age."

Disraeli's Victory of 1874 Aided by Publicans

Sympathy

'He's probably OK once you get to know him - Why don't we invite him out to dinner or something?'

"My dad's a magician- he walks down the road and turns into a pub."

Whistles