Protocol Joker Prints

"Touching this button results in world annihilation. Those disregarding this warning will be publicly reprimanded."

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

'You know too much,'

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

Good News about winter

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

Fish hunting for men.

'How about a game of cards?'

Candid Camera store.

'I love cutting trees in perfect circles because it drives aerial photography interpreters crazy.'

Get crazy once in a while

'My door is always open. That's why I installed a tripwire.'

Beware of Falling Notice.

'Look, Dad, I made a pair of boots out of your chest waders.'

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

"Is it true Dad...is the Earth really made of bleu cheese?"

'Mind taking off your scarf.'

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'I'm afraid I can't take you to my leader without a prior appointment.'

'Boy, does this ever shoot holes in the old Big Bang Theory!'

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

Caution May Contain Nuts.

Shoes Make The Man

"Okay, you scared the babysitter...now get back in there and rinse off that toothpaste, and go to bed!"

While You Were Out: We Moved!

'Dearly beloved.....and the rest of you.....'

Sharks hate practical jokes.

Farmer chasing alien leaving crop circles.

Pole Star

'It's my spare tire. Why do you ask?'