Prophet Of Profit T-Shirts

'At last a sign the bear market may be over.'

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

'We're all right as long as they think we're taking millions.'

'Now this is my kind of green!'

The new boss brought a sense of urgency.

Smiling businessman with rising profits

'Please remember, it's not a lie if it turns a profit.'

"Remember that optimistic, slightly crazy, throw a dart at the wall forecast? We beat it."

"Oh, I can't complain"

'I'm worried about all these unemployed. They're still on our payroll'

"Now that's how to declare a dividend!"

'This is why we can't have nice things... '

'Now think, Harris, what did you do different on that day?'

'I would like to see a little less adventure in this business venture.'

'We were in the right place at the right time but, unfortunately, we were in the wrong time zone.'

'Maximising shareholder value doesn't count.'

"So our agreed strategy is to dominate the market and it creeps profits by 670%. Anybody any idea how to do it?"

'I think you'll find these projections somewhat exaggerated, but in a good way.'

"I can't understand it, we did quite well in the first three quarters.

"Love your feng shui!"

'That's the first nickel I took in!'

Perhaps we could get the Saatchis to pain a pretty picture.

Propping up a profits chart.

"Today we welcome back an old friend."

"A good quarter is a joy forever."

'Here's the improved margins you said you wanted to see this year, Tom.'

'Miss Henshaw - bring me my trumpet.'

"Really? You'd like to be part of this?"

"Graphs are like EKGs, they show the health of a company."

Ethics (with an eye on the bottom line) committee.

"...and right here in Q2 is where the 'you know what' hit the fan. . ."

The Speculators

'This is where we shed all our inhibitions.'

Man climbing line chart, planting profit flag.