Promotion Puzzle Solver T-Shirts

'- but I didn't think it meant a two-made-into one-suit, dammit!'

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'Is the glass half full, Wally, or half empty?' - 'Oh, oh! Trick question!'

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

The Map of the human brain

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Eureka!

'You know too much!'

Extinction of the dinosaurs fully explained

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

Career opportunities

'Recalculating...recalculating...'

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"

Caption contest. After last year's 3,000 entries, we're doing it again! Visit Speedbump.com for info and send your entries to speedbumpcomic@comcast.net.

Wordplay: Gastropod.

'He's not supposed to go out.'

"Wait—what did I come into this room to do?"

Archimedes helps Sisyphus

The Salmon Run