Promotion At A Luxury Hotel T-Shirts

'At prices like this I bet you don't get many customers in here.' - 'At prices like this we don't need many.'

"First class, or with children?"

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

'Okay...3.5 billion in stock, 2.5 billion in cash, 80 million in deferred compensation, my own private jet, a luxury car lease for the next ten years, 3 club memberships and...

Courtyard of the Hotel de France, Montreuil.

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

Kensington Fluffies

"Tracy Island offers palatial splendour in the safest of environments. Your beds are unmade because this is Tracy Emin Island."

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'

Hotel with sign 'Home sweet temporary home'

The Suite Hereafter

"I wrote a poem, even though I'm on vacation."

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

Do not disturb...

Mini Bar

Special! Continental breakfast...$3.99: 'What continent is this suppose to represent - Antarctica!'

'This scent goes well with a diamond necklace.'

"You can enhance your experience in first class by signing up to get live updates of how miserable everyone in coach is."

'Hello room service - can you come and tuck me in and read me a story please'

No early morning tea past this landing

How Patrick Moore chooses a hotel..."Hmmm four stars".

"Gucci Firenze 1921"

'Bed & Bagel'

'What if I promise not to look?'

"We're at the Grand Marina Hotel in Barcelona. Some sheepdog you turned out to be."

"Shoot, I forgot this place has early checkout."

Seal blubber stew

Hotel mini-bar.

'Rest assured, this hotel is second to none in providing for all the creature comforts.'

"Here’s the thermostat. Like all hotel thermostats, it’s just for show."

The trips postponed by La Covid continue

The Queen Mary 2: World's largest ocean liner.