
'Just a minute! Let me look at that gift catalog again.'
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'Just a minute! Let me look at that gift catalog again.'
"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."
So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?
"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."
"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."
Sale on the same stuff as last week.
'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'
"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"
Career opportunities
Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)
"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."
"Pardon me, but why is there no ceiling this office?"
'I'm moving up to be Chairperson-of-the-board. One of you will be President.' (Men have fencing swords).
'I hear you got your increase.' - 'Yes, that proves my theory, if you whine enough, you get anything you want.'
'Parsloe, your desk is blocking the corporate food chain.'
"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"
'You're going to have to work your way up to the ground floor like everyone else.'
'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'
'I highly recommend this painting if you're interested in art as an investment.'
'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'
"Why do you always assume I'm going down?"
"The economy's been worsening for a while, but people still don't feel it, Rudy." "...Which means we still have time to get in on the despair action." "Despair action"? "We're going to expand our menu. Add more comfort foods, more 'sale' items, debt consolidation loans..." "Nobody's dumb enough to get a debt consolidation loan from some random guy." "Ha ha hoo hoo hee-"
"You know, there's a corporate elevator."
'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'
There now, that wasn't too difficult was it!
'We need a product line that will stimulate our profit line.'
"I'm beginning to think they replaced the ladder of success with a greased pole."
Online Shopping.
"And here is where we started putting profits before people."
"I thought the travel agent said 40% off."
'You are smarter, faster and more efficient than Carter... they's why I'm making you the new assistant to Carter!'
Unusual Offers
"Remember when everyone told you this job would lead you nowhere? Well, you've arrived!"
'You may feel lost and insignificant at first working for us.'
"While you make the sales presentation, Monica. I'll scope out the room and try to identify this company's Achilles heel!"
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