Profit Whisperer T-Shirts

"Those investments in congressmen are really paying off."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

"If I made as much as him, I could retire in a couple of days"

You can breed these if the environment is right.

'We're asking what america can do without to reduce the deficit...no, ma'ma! the Gop and Dems are not options!'

Opening the door to new customers

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

'Need I tell you the name of the game?'

'Honestly Bob, it's not that bad. If you can make as much next year as you did this year you'll be able to pay off your outstanding taxes for last year. That'll just leave the interest, the tax for this year and... my fees.'

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

'I'll need more than I can spend.'

"I'm allergic to money. But luckily they've got antihistamines for that."

'If we're going to have a banking relationship, you'll have to trust me more than this.'

"Do you swear to calm the jittery financial markets, all the jittery financial markets and nothing but the jittery financial markets, so help you God?"

'That's true son..Money can't buy happiness. But it makes being unhappy a little easier to live with.'

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

'Looks like the perfect time to bring in our profit sharing scheme.'

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

"If you really must know, Junior, yes, you were a market correction."

'Now go out there and sell yourself!'

"Money is life's report card."

'One thing about being in the drivers seat -- you pay for the gas.'

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

'Don't worry about making your will, Miss Moneybags leave everything to me. . .'

GAS. If you have to ask, you probably can't afford it.

"I know we said we would get you a laptop.. but this will have to do until business gets better."

'For the economy to improve we're counting on a 'trickle down' from the super-wealthy to the wealthy.'

"I know your dad's a hedge fund manager, Amber, but you don't need a bigger piece of paper to draw a picture of your house."

"I've found that when money starts talking, you can't shut 'er up!"

"After viewing your current account balance, I think you should read the sign."

"Want to trade banks with me?"