Profile Navigator T-Shirts

'You looked a lot smaller online.'

In the Guru District

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

'Are we there yet?'

"We'll always have couples therapy."

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

Couples' therapy

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

'Great Therapy!'

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

"I am not asking for directions."

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

Between Offices

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"And finally, I’d like to thank all those people I stepped on and used to get here. I couldn’t have done it without your submissive insecurity and relentless resignation."

"Of course I won't forget to tell you when quarantine's over!"

"There's something I have to tell you."

"Do we go out or do we stay home and open a can of worms?"

Titanic: How's my steering.

Battery Lighthouse

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."