Professional Fibber Pillows

"The D's stand for 'dandy,' Mom, and the C means 'copacetic.'"

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

"The sweater you knit him will be thrown out in February."

Cat rolls up yarn like power cord.

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

Begin this high fiber diet slowly. Too fast and your co-workers may complain of a greenhouse effect.

"Do you have any knitting patterns for somebody who can only count to five?"

"They have oat fiber, wheat fiber, and rice fiber, but no moral fiber."

Knitted Kitty.

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.

Sawdust.

'I gave her that ball of yarn...'

House of Beans - No Smoking.

'You're eating too much roughage.'

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

'Yes, it is a carrot. You haven't been getting enough fibre.'

KNITEO ERGO SUM!

"It doesn't scream 'Girlie Lawyer'?"

"I love every single one of these."

'I'll have three of those trout, but throw them to me. . . I want to tell the wife I caught them.'

The screaming fart.

Nyargh! - 'I swear I will never eat fibre again...' - 'I christen thee 'Titan'.'

'You need more fiber and less cholesterol in your diet. Throw out the eggs you bought and eat the carton they came in.'

'Now where did I put my knitting needles?'

'Looks like you've got enough fiber in your system.'

"It's the worse case of flatulence I've ever witnessed!"

"We quickly realized it was fruitless trying to compete, so now we work together and sell blended wool..."

Live Laugh Knit

Jack the Ripper.

"There's too much fibre in your diet! Your roots are showing!"

Crocheting during lockdown

"Sir, do you have any idea how slow you were going?"

Haircuts