Productive Powerhouse Pillows

"I tend to get more done when I leave self-loathing off the to-do list."

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

"Now that's a win."

"Drunk, yet orderly"

'I don't want your input until you produce some output.'

Time Out For Teddy

Corporate Whore.

Doctor to man: 'You're a workaholic - you tested positive for elbow grease.'

"Don't wait up for me. I'm going to have to put in an all-winter."

'He's under office-arrest.'

"You can't see a grief counselor just because you got a 'B'."

"You've been so productive lately, I've decided to lay the entire staff off so you can do their work as well."

'This is the time when the University started to rank our research by the number of publications, not the quality of the publications...'

Workaholism is a disease. It can be cured.

"Ed, your lack of procrastination is causing some morale problems with the rest of the staff."

'Sometimes the boss exerts too much pressure about meeting a project deadline.'

'Why don't you go and borrow Jeff's tools? While you're at it, borrow Jeff.'

"Son, this is the key to success - it opens the room where we keep the money."

"Well, for this amount we could do you a nice word-of-mouth campaign!"

"So, how can we explain this dip in productivity which seems to happen every Wednesday?"

"They're considering order-fulfillment as a new Olympic sport."

"She scares the hell out of me. She's brainy, creative and sexy."

Hands off my IP!

"His productivity apps pushed him to an early grave."

"I never nap. Such a waste of life. Besides, if I spend all my time napping, I won't finish my graphic novel."

'It has my horoscope, heart rate and cholesterol level...but I'm sorry, I don't have the time.'

"The internet wants to destroy your productivity."

Malcolm's got a mind like a steel trap.

Mom's Gym

'Welcome to the interview for our Post-Doc position, I hope you've brought your publication list...'

Buy- out specialist

"I've finished my New Year's resolutions, and now I'm going to get a running start on yours."

"I don't know why these people are complaining, we give them stimulating,challenging work...and we let them do it for 80 hours a week."

"So now you're reading a book?"